Week three has been rough for me. As predicted by the book, I had some real highs and lows emotionally, which I was not really prepared for. One day I had a little bit of an emotional breakdown. It was some feelings I’ve been having for a while, but I thought I had them in check. But it’s probably for the best that they come out. I feel better now, but it’s been great to work through things on the morning pages. Speaking of morning pages, I did them every single day! An improvement!
But my Artist’s Date was not what I was hoping. I wanted to do other things, but I ended up just baking pies. It was fun. An activity I enjoy, but it was kind of a cheat as I was just preparing for the pie contest. It was not purely for my enjoyment. So that was a failure this week.
I have noticed one very powerful change, I’m craving music. For the last few years, I’ve kind of given music up. It’s not that I don’t like it, I listen to music on the radio in the car and when I’m working out, but the rest of the time I listen to podcasts. And I think that’s taken away an important emotional outlet for me. I’m finding myself seeking out new bands again and downloading albums. A really good change. I didn’t know how much I missed it.
The Artist Way does a lot of talk about synchronicity this week. That’s when you experience two events as meaningfully related. I have always believed in this, but I definitely experienced this over the last few weeks. Unhappy with my position at work, I’ve started taking a class at Portland State. The what do you know? I get an new assignment at work. Yes, this probably is cause and effect situation but my first feeling was that of synchronicity. I think I’ve opened myself up to more opportunity.
This next week: Recovering A Sense of Integrity. I’m supposed to do a Reading Deprivation, get rid of an outfit that lowers my self worth and write a letter to myself when I’m 80 years old. Where do you want to be when you’re 80? Tough questions ahead.